Hello and welcome to the penultimate post in my autobiographical series. By now you know the drill. Start on post 1 here, or just go ahead and read from here. It really makes no difference to me how you approach it! Today, I’m going to focus on the birth of my first son, Julian, and how that has influenced me. Because no matter how you slice it, having a child changes things. And I’ll say it right off the bat: being a parent is the greatest challenge I’ve ever faced. Of course, I love a good challenge!
Life’s Greatest Challenge
I’ve always wanted to have a family of my own. For as long as I can remember, I knew I was destined to be a husband and father. I know in today’s climate that might sound strange, but it’s the truth. With many things in life, however, the reality of something is much different than what we might imagine in our head. I was naïve, and to be completely honest, I was unfair to a lot of parents.
Raising a human being is such a profound challenge. Because while most things in life really aren’t so important, bringing up a child with their wellbeing at the forefront puts a lot of pressure on you. And truth be told, I think sometimes that imagined pressure makes things a lot more difficult than they ought to be. But when it comes down to it, teaching a child about a world, especially one full of such strife and conflict, is a daunting task to say the least.
Building a Better Future
You see, my wife and I always like to consider the bigger picture. We want our son to pursue his God-given purpose in broken world. We want him to have freedom and opportunities that we never had. And sometimes, I think we put unrealistic pressure on ourselves. Because even though he may just be one boy in a vast ocean of children, we want to ensure that he grows up with a heart full of compassion and love. We want him to be part of the solution in the world, not just another person going with the flow of the tide.
How do you raise a child to think independently while also ensuring he considers his impact on those around him? What sort of disciplinary methods do you use that won’t cause unintended alterations in behavior down the road? And when you’re sick and feeling like you want nothing but to sleep, how do you push through and still provide the loving and gentle touch to a needy child?
All of this and so much more comes into play. And when it comes down to it, you must do what will work for all parties involved.
Informing the World of Evorath
This new perspective of fatherhood has undoubtedly had a profound impact on my writing. When writing the final book of my Evorath trilogy, The Battle for Erathal, that perspective helped inform expectant parents Artimus and Savannah. And writing these stories now, it helps me better realize the implications and realities of what I’m setting out to do with Evorath. That is, in The Legends of Evorath series, there’s a big theme of family, one that I understood from the perspective of a husband, son, and brother. But now, I can say I better understand what it is to be a parent, and the unique challenges faced in that role.
Next week, I’ll be back with the final post in this series. I’ll bring everything we’ve talked about together to answer perhaps the most complicated question one can ask of themselves: who am I really?
Until then, I hope you picked up The Shadows of Erathal and are enjoying the read so far! Don’t forget to check back this Friday when I’ll share a highlight from another special character in the series. For now, God bless!
